Below I share a prayer experience as I entered into one of the mysteries of the Rosary. It is vulnerable to share my deeper heart of prayer because it is a very intimate and sacred time with God. And, as well, it is difficult to fully capture the extent of what I may experience; because it is always hard to capture in words the deeper heart experiences.
My primary reason for wanting to share this with you is because I believe very few people realize how profound and fulfilling the gifts and graces are that God has for us, just by coming to Him each day in prayer. By this I don’t mean we will always feel consolation or have mystical experiences in prayer. But rather, any time we turn to God and seek to be in relationship with Him, we will always be blest. He is always faithful. And, if we persevere in a consistent prayer life, we will know the blessings of which I speak.
It is so important for each of us as we enter into prayer, to truly come to God with our hearts exposed, surrendered, and inviting Him in… and that we have a listening heart to hear and receive what God wants to reveal to us personally. He knows best what we need. My prayer experience below spoke deeply to me and resonated within me, allowing me to encounter Jesus personally.
But for each person it will be different. If each one of us meditated on the same Gospel passage, we would be drawn to and touched by different things. God would speak to each of us uniquely and personally from just where we are, and about just what we need to hear.
If we truly enter into our prayer time with our heart, it becomes a mutual/reciprocal encounter where we share our heart with Him and He shares His Heart with us.
This is what Our Lady of Medjugorje is wanting for us when she tells us to, “pray with the heart.”
The Agony in the Garden-
As I enter into this mystery, encountering my Divine Bridegroom suffering/agonizing so deeply in the Garden of Gethsemane, to the point of sweating His Precious Blood, I long to hold Him to my heart and caress Him in His suffering and this is what I do. As my heart is clasped to His Heart which is so pure, so sacred, filled with such love and goodness – the words that flow from my heart are: “Forgive me Lord, I know not what I do (and I bring with me all of humanity as well)… Forgive me Lord, for the ways I don’t receive Your love, trust in Your love, and love You with my whole heart in return. Forgive me for the ways I am indifferent to Your presence and Your love, which are always with me. Forgive me for the ways I have, and still do play part in the grave agony you experience in this mystery.”
Then I rest – my heart next to His, in the clasp of our embrace – receiving His love for some time; being attentive to His personal presence to me; and striving to love Him and console Him in return, in reparation for my own sins, and those of all of humanity.
It is our hearts that He wants – our deeper hearts…
May we all have the grace throughout this Lenten Season to encounter Jesus, the Father, the Holy Spirit, and Mary in the various mysteries of the Rosary and the Stations of the cross, by exercising our spiritual senses…
For, as He tells us, “Blessed are those who do not see but believe.”
(by lilla marie lottinger)